It’s true, I’m a liar. A huge, gigantic liar. Do I lie to other people. Not usually. The person I lie to is myself, and honestly, that’s a million times worse than lying to other people.
I tell myself that things are going well when in reality, they kind of suck. I tell myself that financially things are good when I’m barely holding my head above water. I lie to myself about the relationships that I’m in when in actuality, their poisonous and toxic.
I put on a facade that I’m this really positive forward thinking person. In actuality, I’m probably the most negative, full of self-doubt person there is.
Why would anybody do this to themselves? Well, I can’t speak for the rest of the world, I can barely speak for myself. But I think the answer is because it’s easier. Staying right where you are and doing what you’ve always done, remaining stagnant and unchanging is not only easier, it’s a hell of a less scary.
The question is, do I want to remain the way I am, a liar to myself, trapped in a bad place emotionally, financially struggling and ruining my life by hanging on to people that I should let go of, or do I want to move forward and make some changes.
The answer is, I have no idea. I’m not big on the change, and I’m a huge coward….I really just don’t know what to do