I want to write. I make no secrets about that. I also don’t write, and I don’t make any secrets about that, or excuses. I’m lazy AF, I’m a master procrastinator, and I’m afraid. Around 11 years ago, I started writing a YA fiction book with the hopes that it could maybe morph into a series. Then life got crazy and it just got pushed aside. All writing of the fiction type did. I’m not making excuses, that’s just the way it is.
I did NANWRIMO in 2013, revamping a fan fic, but that wasn’t the same, plus it sucked. This year, I toyed with starting NANOWRIMO. I got two paragraphs written, but I just wasn’t feeling it. Well last night, I pulled out those two paragraphs, and the stuff I started a
while back a decade ago, and I realized that the couple of paragraphs would actually make a good prologue for the older stuff.
The older stuff, well it’s not great, and there are lots of grammatical errors and typos, but that’s what editing is for. There is also a storyline in it that is supposed to be a motivating factor, but I’m not sure if i want to keep – it deals with physical abuse, and I’m not really sure if I want to go there.
But I’m thinking about writing again, and I’m ready, I think. I’m not sure, but I’m closer to being ready than I have been in a very long time. Writing has always been an escape for me, and honestly, in my life right now, I have a lot from which I want to escape. I’m kind of stumped about where to share this writing. Nobody uses LJ any longer, and nobody visits my fanfic forum either. It’s not fanfic so I can’t put it on fanfic.net either. I know there are places out on the interwebs to share original stuff, but I’m not comfortable doing that either. Why? Because it’s either going to be good, and sharing it that way means it can be stolen, or more realistically, it’s going to suck and who wants to put themselves out there for ridicule!
I’m thinking I’m going to put it here, and password protect it, and if people want to read it, I’ll give them the password. So I’m ready, I think. I even hope. I need an outlet. It used to be writing, and I want it to be writing again. I just need to begin.